Can’t sleep…astronauts will eat me…
I should be in bed right now, catching up on all the sleep I’ve been missing over the last few days. I should be dreaming all the dreams I haven’t been dreaming, and I should have gone to bed two hours ago when I was moderately sleepy, instead of staying up and catching up on the crack TV I’ve been TiVo-ing for the last week or so.
But I’m not. I can’t sleep, so I figured I’d come onto the computer and blog, mostly because I know I haven’t been blogging for a while, which Neenyd reminded me on Saturday. Has it really been a month? Sheesh.
Cat update: Itchy’s still no better, although he’s off the ear medication. We now lovingly call him the “sideways” cat, since he constantly tilts his head to the right. He’s been managing with his disability so well that we let him outside, but he can’t get up and down the stairs by himself, so we (read: I) have to pick him up and carry him in and out of the house. He enjoys being outside, though, and I figure as long as the weather’s nice, it’s not so bad. I’m going to make another appointment with the vet, though, just in case there is something else they can do to make him “normal” again.
In the news: Sheikh Muszaphar Shukor is the first Malaysian to go into space. When I heard the story on BBC World News this morning, I actually thought he was also the first Muslim in space, but apparently I was wrong about that. He is, however, the first Muslim to be observing Ramadan in space, and he actually got the Islamic National Fatwa Council to write up a whole handbook on how to pray, fast, and otherwise observe Ramadan properly in space.
This is just another reason why I don’t like organized religion: they spend all this time and energy working out the correct way to pray instead of actually manifesting those prayers into something tangible, like helping the poor or working on peace in the Middle East or doing something about the atrocities in Darfur.
Argh. Okay, back to bed again…maybe I’ll try counting sheep.
Filed under Blogging, Cats, Cranky, Religion, Space | Comment (0)Intelligent Falling
For those of you who have been following the developments of the so-called “intelligent design” debate, check out this article from The Onion (I love that rag!). Apparently gravity is just a theory, too; it’s called “intelligent falling.”
This also falls in line with the beliefs of those who follow Spaghetti Monsterism or have been touched by his noodly appendage.
Filed under Religion | Comment (1)Jehovah’s Witnesses
So this morning at around 11:30 or so, the doorbell rang. I certainly wasn’t presentable to be receiving any guests, but anyone who had the gall to ring my doorbell on a Saturday deserved to see me in my PJ’s with stubbly legs and pits and, worst of all, bed hair. I opened the door to find…
JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES! (cue scary music)
Yes, the JW’s were making the rounds again. They’ve been to our house before on several occasions, and I’ve always been very polite. The first time they came around, it was one woman. I told her that nobody in our house was Christian, and she had this really blank look on her face, like she didn’t really know what to say to that. She blurted out a, “Okay, thank you, good day,” and backed down the driveway. That made me chuckle.
The second time they came by, there were two of them, a man and a woman, who before they had started pulling out their copy of the Watchtower, started telling me that they were starting up a Bible study class. I told them that we had no use for a Bible class, since nobody here was Christian. I don’t think the woman heard me, because she said, “That’s okay. We just want to talk to you about some of the things in the Bible.” I smiled and said, “Thank you, but I don’t believe in the Bible, so I don’t think that would help me.” She gave me this blank, puzzled look as if I had just given her a lecture on calculus. I smiled again and said, “Thank you very much,” and closed the door.
They must not have spread the word around to the other JW’s about us, because this morning they were back again. One would have thought my unkempt appearance would have stopped them short, but I suppose if you’re on a mission from God, or Jehovah or whomever (hey, why don’t they call themselves JHVH’s Witnesses? Or Yaweh’s Witnesses?) little things like my smelly just-out-of-bed smell wouldn’t bother them.
I opened the door, saw the two of them (a man and a woman, but both different people from last time), saw the woman holding a stack of Watchtower pamphlets, and rolled my eyes. “Hi, we’re from–” “I’m sorry, but we’re not Christians here. Thanks.” I had no time to quibble, not when there was some serious hygenic issues going on with me. I had the door halfway closed, when the man said, “Wait, you’re not CHRISTIAN?” His eyes were opened really wide, and were kind of bugging out of his head.
Yes, moron. There are some people still left in this country who are not Christian. I know it doesn’t seem like it the way our President talks, but we are still out here. “No. Thank you.”
Once again, I start to close the door, and he blurts out again, “You mean, you don’t believe in Jesus Christ?”
I paused, trying to think of the best way to answer this. Do I believe that there was a guy named Jesus back in the day? Probably. Do I “believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, the only son of God, eternally begotten of the father…for my sake was crucified under Pontius Pilate, suffered and was buried…ascended into heaven and is seated at the right hand of the Father?” Not particularly. Do I accept him as my personal saviour? Definitely not. But I didn’t really want to get into it with this guy. The poor man’s eyes were going to pop out for sure.
So I said, “Nope, sure don’t. Thanks!” I closed the door quickly this time, but not before I heard him say, “Well, I’ll be sure to come back.”
Oh, great. That’s the last thing I need, a Jehovah’s Witness who wants to convert me to Christianity AND bring me into his cult. I need a better way to get rid of them. Should I invite them in and offer to perform a hex on their enemies?
Filed under Religion, Wicca | Comments (3)Touched By His Noodly Appendage
So I realize that some people in cyberspace think this is old news, but Cousin Mike just sent this link my way this morning, and it brightened up my entire day. In response to the Kansas School Board’s decision (so far) to allow the teaching of Intelligent Design, Bobby Henderson, a college graduate and follower of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (who, he asserts to the Kansas School Board, has created all things), has asked quite politely to allow equal time in science class for discussion of his theory of Flying Spaghetti Monsterism. He’s gathered quite a following, and I, for one, am inclined to support his ideas. All he wants is what’s fair: “One third time for Intelligent Design, one third time for Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, and one third time for logical conjecture based on overwhelming observable evidence.”
Seriously, though. You have to go to the web site. It’s hilarious.
Filed under Religion | Comment (0)